A story I wrote

[STARWARSFREAK]

I don't really like to double post, so if you've read my chapters please comment. Thank you, and here's

Chapter 11:

Gerardo slowly came to. He had no idea what had just happened, but the entire Lander had been ripped in two. It was a miracle he was even alive, made apparent by the seven corpses scattered around the crash site. He heard footsteps, and a figure appeared over him. It was Paulie, who helped him up.

"Thanks, buddy. What happened?"

"No idea." Paulie responded. "The Lander got ripped in two. We have 19 survivors in the warehouse east of here."

"Is Louis there?" Gerardo asked.

"No. But he isn't dead. Far as I know, anyways. Can't find him or the Lt. Pilot's missing, too. They won't answer radio and their transponders were logged off about a minute after the crash. I don't know if they're dead, but it doesn't look good." Gerardo's heart shrunk three sizes that day. His best friend was as good as dead, and even if he was alive, they were all in a warzone. Paulie saw the look on Gerardo's face, and tried to distract him.

"Come on. We're the only two NCO's left. Those soldiers need leaders, and they'll be counting on us. Let's move, Corporal." The two turned towards the warehouse and began the longest march of their lives.

----

Louis' head beat like a drum. Whatever had happened during the crash, it had left every inch of his body wracked in pain. Slowly, he mustered his strength and looked to his right. The pilot was dead, his head smeared all over the controls. His stomach should have rebelled, but he was just too weak to move. He looked outside, looking for any sign of Neal. He found him, but in the worst way. A huge pile of rubble rested just to the side of the Lander, and out of it stuck a cobalt blue gauntlet. The one worn by Lieutenant Marcus Neal.

This was fantastic. Louis was alone in a warzone, his squad nowhere to be found, the pilot, his only ticket out, was soup, and Neal was buried under ten tons of rocks. He was on the verge of tears when he heard a sound. Faint, at first, but it steadily grew.

Footsteps

Finally, the source of the sound came into view. A young man, not even 30 stepped into view. He was covered in a black trenchcoat, leaving nothing revealed but his face, remarkably pale. His eyes were shielded by a pair of sunglasses, but even then the piercing eyes behind them were obvious. His hair was a dirty blonde color, and untidy, making it obvious how long he'd been away from civilization.

The man approached him and extended his hand.

"Come on, Louis, get up. We've got work to do. Come with me." His voice was calm, nearly a whisper, yet loud and calm at the same time. Louis began to get up when he saw it. The hand in the rocks began to twitch. With a loud crash, Neal burst from the rocks, hardly a scratch on him. He pointed a pistol at the back of the man's head.

"No way, Shade. This one stays with me." The so called Shade then began to chuckle. Again, only very quietly. He spoke again.

"Well, well, Marcus, it has been some time, hasn't it? It's rather hard to believe that it's been a year and you're still a Lieutenant. You have more skill than that. You should be well on your way to a general by now."

"I have my reasons, Shade." Neal replied.

"Of course, Marcus." Shade continued. "If you were a General, you would have no time to look after Louis. But come on, Neal. We both know how it works. He's received the vision, and you know I can find him after that. He was born to be an Ultima, Neal. Just like you. However, for the sake of humanity, I cannot let this boy go."

"What do you need him for, Shade?" Neal asked, his pistol still raised to Shade's face, now turned towards him. "You've already taken Rebecca, your numbers are full! Why should I let you take Louis too?"

"Because, Marcus..." Shade paused, and for a moment, a slight emotion flashed on his face. "Rebecca is dead."

[Taivyx]

Holy sweet mother of ...........

Just wow.
I haven't been following this story, but after reading just this page, I'm stunned.
This is just too freaking awesome to describe.
Better than any action novel I've read. Even ones by Tom Clancy.
I would say keep up the great work, but this is obviously not great. It's the best I've seen as of yet.

[STARWARSFREAK]

Aw, you've got to be kidding me. I spent an hour yesterday writing the next chapter, and it's gone? Did a mod delete it or something? I would really like some answers if anyone has them, because I spent a long time writing that chapter.

[Hebes24]

http://www.gametoast.com/forums/viewtop ... =2&t=13586

[JackSkratch]

http://www.gametoast.com/forums/viewtop ... =2&t=13586... Dangit, Hebes.

Anyway, I allready read it, its good as always, keep it up!

[STARWARSFREAK]

Hey, everyone. Just posting really quick to let you know that I'm not abandoning the topic, though I haven't posted in a while. I've got a huge project in school, so I won't be able to post for a week... or three. Admins, please don't lock this, as I haven't given up, I just don't have the time I need to write right now.

See you soon! (I hope)

-Your friendly neighborhood Intergalactic Overlord, STARWARSFREAK.

[STARWARSFREAK]

Hey, everyone! Miss me? Yeah I thought not...

Anyways, guys, sorry for the wait, for those who remember me. Here's the next chapter (I'll repost 12 at some point, but not right now, so think of it as my story's "Lost Episode").

Chapter 13:

Matthias was rooted to the ground in sheer horror as all traces of sanity left his idol, the Grandmaster. The bloodmage laughed in a maniacal tone as his creation destroyed the entire city. Civilians and soldiers alike were flattened by the monster as it swung wildly, taking down every building around it. Finally, Matthias could take no more. He looked to the Grandmaster with a solemn look.

"Grandmaster Methuselah, stop. Now."

This statement surprised the old mage, and he stopped for a moment to look at his follower. "What did you say to me, boy?"

"I told you to stop. The UMC cannot stop us, and they are in retreat. You are not pushing them out of the city, you are merely killing without discrimination. Bloodless may be inferior, but they are still human! They are not to be slaughtered like lambs!"

The Grandmaster face stretched with a ghastly smirk. "Boy, you are wrong. They must die because they are inferior. If the condition of our world is to ever improve, we cannot leave it in the hands of such weak fools! They must be eliminated, there is no other way!"

"No, Grandmaster." Matthias replied. "There is another way: If I stop you."

Any trace of satisfaction had now left the old Bloodmage's face. "I warn you boy, the ground you tread on is very dangerous. Another wrong word, and I shall strike you down."

"Then do it, Grandmaster! I would rather die than follow you if this is the means you use to accomplish your goals!" With that final outburst, Matthias quickly spun a wind disc and fired it, cutting a swathe into his leader's face. The man was obviously shocked by this, but not phased in the slightest. His hands dug into the ground, and spikes began to rise from the floor. Matthias jumped from spike to spike, moving with enough agility to dodge the attack, but the old man wasn't done. With a flex of his hands, the spikes exploded, impaling the younger mage with thousands of shards or concrete and steel. Blood poured from the wounds, and Matthias began to see a rainbow of colors swirl and pool in his vision. Determined to continue, he fired a stream of molten lave from his right hand, which was caught by the Grandmaster and tossed aside, setting alight several Archmage corpses. From Matthias' left hand came a shard of ice, which the old man dodged with finesse, and countered with a bolt of energy from the heavens. Matthias was hit head-on, suffering a near-fatal wound. The boy fell to the ground. All color had been drained from both his skin and his vision, and his sight was too blurry to make out his opponent.

"You put up a good fight, boy." The Grandmaster explained. "But you are too powerful, I cannot afford to let you live." Summoning a massive quantity of aura, the Grandmaster formed a javelin of light, and impaled the young mage, sending him hurtling off of the tower. As Matthias fell, his vision left him, and blackness enveloped his body.

...

Without warning, as Shade dragged Louis through the alleys, he blurted out in a near trance-like tone: "The final piece is set. The rebellion has begun, the shadow is on the march, and the machine's cogs begin to turn. As the darkness engulfs this city, I feel the will of the Gods push and pull. This is no longer in my hands." He looked at his new charge, still asleep. "It is in yours."

[plasmoidmonkey]

Nice to see you back. Good update.

[STARWARSFREAK]

Time for...

Chapter 14:

"Jenkins, check that corner!" Under the sergeant's orders, Private Jenkins worked his way through the squad, all piled up at the street corner, and laid a tiny remote cam on the ground. He pulled out his remote operator, and slowly guided the drone around the corner. Sure enough, two guards in silver armor patrolled next to a nearby doorway.

"Just like you thought, sarge." Jenkins explained. "They're Shifters. Two of 'em, by that door."

The Sergeant walked up to him. Paulie Duncan stood there for a moment, contemplating the situation, and without a word directed two men around the corner. With silenced SMGs, the two soldiers swung around the corner and took down the Shifters in a couple of seconds. One of the soldiers, Corporal Gerardo Marez, signalled "all-clear" and the squad moved forward.

For the last 48 hours, Paulie's squad had been weaving in and out of the city streets. The UMC command was in chaos, as the gigantic Colossus laid waste to the entire city, and everyone in it. By now, all faith had been lost in the generals, and individual squads waged guerilla warfare against the Bloodmages. However, the Shifters had arrived the previous night, their intentions unknown. At the most recent hookup between the surviving forces, Paulie's team had been ordered to infiltrate the Shifter base, and find out what they were up to.

The team moved to the door. A ladder stood next to them. Paulie sent a text to the HUDs of the built-in screens on his team's helmets: Gerardo was to take seven men up the ladder, while the other dozen was to move into the base with Paulie. Normally, a smaller number would be used for stealth operations, but no chances could be taken when going up against the Shifters.

Once Gerardo's team was up the ladder, Paulie opened the door. Three four-man teams, designated fire teams Alpha through Delta spread out across the lower factory level. Up above, on Paulie's TACNAV, a map spread out of the office buildings above, and Gerardo's two teams, designated Echo and Foxtrot, secured the office floor, eliminating several guards without triggering an alarm. Finally, Paulie caught up with Alpha team, who was piled up against a small closet. They opened it to find a Shifter guard. He was ready for relief, not an enemy squad. Pfc. Bren and Pvt. O'Malley tackled him before he could counter, and he was dead in seconds. Tech Specialist Lambardo began to examine a device found behind the Shifter.

"Standard-issue Echelon-7 Flash bomb." Lambardo explained. "Most likelyd for self-defense. Probably only one of these, since one's enough to take out the whole factory..."

"And half the block." A rookie from Bravo Team interrupted.

Ten minutes later, and the clearing was complete. First Squad regrouped, and moved to the door. Paulie gave the signal, and a detpack was blown on the door. Sharpnel flew through the wood, and killed three Shifters on the other side. The squad moved in, believing the room to be secure. However, they found themselves surrounded. All across the upper level, Shifter soldiers stood, rifles aimed at the heads of the UMC soldiers below. A single Shifter was on their floor. Most likely an officer.

"Well, whadda we have here?" He began. "A couple'a hotshot Bloodbolts what think dey kin take all'a us at once. Well, lemme tell ya somethin'. Ya thought wrong." By the time the last sentance was uttered, he had approached within inches of Paulie's face.

"Really?" Paulie asked. He shouted into his TEAMCOMM "Marez, now!"

Doors opened from all sides on the upper floor, and eight UMC soldiers rushed in, tackling the Shifters. Within moments, all of the Shifters were either dead, or tangled in melee combat with the Bloodbolts. The Shifter officer had been watching this, and turned back to Paulie to find a .50 caliber pistol aimed in-between his eyes.

"Who's the hotshot now?" Paulie asked.

"Me--" The officer was cut off as a slug punched through his skull. Blood flowing from the wound, the man fell to the floor, and Lambardo rushed to the console to one side of the room.

"This was too easy;" Lambardo began. "there must be more coming. I'll have to do this quick." With expert skill, the soldier ran through thousands of programs, hacking the system with more cold efficiency than any computer program could. Finally, he finished, but there was no "job-well-done" smirk that usually crossed the middle-aged Caucasian's face.

"Sarge, take a look at this." With his summoning, Paulie and Gerardo approached the screen, and read with awe the orders given to the officer of this platoon:

Copperhead, your target is the UMC Private known as Louis Tarkin Jacobs. He recently dissapeared after an encounter with the beast the Bloodmages have unleashed, but he is confirmed alive. He is believed to be with the Ultima Agent Shade. Shade would not have sought him out unless our suspicions are correct: Louis Jacobs is infected with the Ultima disease, and must be immediately eliminated. Without him in our way, victory over this city - no, this planet, is assured. May the Bloodwind guide you, my assassin of the night.

"Paulie..." Gerardo began. "D-does this mean..."

"Yes," Paulie answered before the question was completed. "Louis is still out there." He took the safety off of his Mk. IX Assault Rifle. "And we're gonna find him."

[Delta 47]

Great chapter! I wish I had good writing skills . I try my best because my mom's a Writer but I can never do it good enough.

[STARWARSFREAK]

Don't worry about it, delta. You think I was born this good? It's pretty much trial-and-error. If you keep trying, and have a good Language Arts teacher, you should do fine. Besides, I'm not all that great. To be honest, I screen my chapters, and take polls on the quality before they ever see the light of GameToast.

[STARWARSFREAK]

Chapter 15:

Where am I?

The question swam through Louis' head once, twice... a thousand times? He had lost track. And did it really matter? He was alive, right? But with that thought, the seeds of doubt were sewn.

Maybe I'm not alive. Am I dead? Is this the final destination of the dead? An endless void of uncertainty?

No, that couldn't be it. He began to warm. His body flushed with life again, and the blood began to flow. His eyes began to focus, yearning to discover new sights, to find out where they had gone, where they had been for hours, or days, or weeks. Finally, Louis' vision focused into a clear image. He couldn't tell where he was, but it was a bunker of some sort. No light entered the room, with the exception of a single flourescent lamp perched at the ceiling, a dozen meters in the air. Then, his ears were assaulted. Tiny pinpricks at first, but they soon became a coherent tapping. It grew louder, more impatient with him. Turn! they yelled. Turn, and find out what assails you! Louis could stand it no more, and mustered his strength, for he had little remaining. He twisted his neck, and the head followed, and to his right, to the far side of the room, the man in the trenchcoat... Shade? Yes, Shade was the man sitting there, typing some unknown message onto a computer.

The man known as Shade's ears perked up, and was apparently alerted that his guest was waking. He finished the message quickly, but what it was, Louis could not tell. When he was done, he sent, and got up from his seat.

"So" he began. "I see you're finally awake, Louis. I've been waiting for several hours now. First off, I'm going to presume you're wondering where you are, and what happened to Lt. Neal, correct?" He had guessed right. "First of all, you are in a bunker, in the Slums of Hong Kong. The district isn't exactly sought after, so it's the best place to hide. This bunker -" he paused to pat the wall next to him. "is at least 40 feet thick, and around 100 meters underground. We're safe from just about anything short of an Echelon-1 bomb in here. Second, your friend Marcus, is dead. You may remember that he and I came to a... disagreement over the drafting of his daughter. He went in a rage, trying to protect you. I had no choice but to put him down, as he was a threat to your safety."

"How was he a threat?!" Louis attempted to shout. However, it only came out as a hoarse whisper. "He was trying to protect me, and you killed him! And just who are you? I've never met you in my life!"

"It does not take a physical meeting to know of another person, Louis." Shade explained. "Ever since your vision of the New York invasion, two years ago, I've been watching you. At first it seemed as if they - the visions, that is - were going to continue, and if they were you would be discovered. However, they stopped shortly after the invasion, so you were safe for the moment. However, your vision of Hong Kong was too precise, too exact. I knew I had to act. If you had stayed with Marcus, you would be dead."

"How do you figure that?"

"I don't figure. I know it to be a fact. Less than three days after your vision, Louis, a detachment of Shifter assassins arrived in Hong Kong. I intercepted a transmission from UMC command. They're here looking for you. After I brought you here, I did some reconaissance. Exactly one hours after we had evacuated the crash site of your Lander, Shifters swarmed the place. I counted twenty, for the advance party. You'd have been dead in an instant. I hope you see now, Louis, for the sake of peace, I had to get you out of there. Humanity as a whole depends on it."

"What do you mean, Humanity depends on it? I don't understand."

"That is to be expected, Louis. You will learn in time. As for now, we have a guest." As if he had seen it coming a mile away, the elevator to the bunker began to whir as someone came down the lift. Slowly, slowly it inched towards the bottom, until it clunked into place. Shade walked to the door, and extended his arms, as if to embrace the visitor. However, that was not the case.

When the door opened, someone fell out. It was a Bloodmage, covered in stab wounds, bite marks, every type of physical harm imaginable. It seemed a miracle he was even alive. He fell into Shade's arms, no longer able to stand. His blood-stained lips began to move, and uttered only two words. "Please, help..."

"Do not worry," Shade began. "You are among friends here, Matthias."

[STARWARSFREAK]

What, no comments? Was the Ray Bradbury homage taking it to far?

[JackSkratch]

Patience, my freind. Patience.

I'll read it eventually.

[STARWARSFREAK]

Well, now that summer break has begun and I have finished moping, I hope I'll be able to begin writing chapters more often.

Chapter 16:

Midnight. Darkness had descended upong Hong Kong, and the fighting had ceased, for the moment. Sensing the lull, the remainder of the UMC forces had fallen back to the Harbor, their home territory in the city. In a series of alleys and courtyards, a few hundred men were gathered around burning oil barrels. Though fuel was precious, the operators of the machines were even more-so, so every resource was expended to keep them alive and well.

Somewhere in the mess of it all, a single man sat inside a ragged tent. He observed a map of the current frontlines of the city, and experimented with the pieces on the board, contemplating strategies and plans of attack. The man was Warrant Officer Kirk Walker. After a recent counter-attack by a Shifter team, the Colonel and his staff had been killed, leaving the WO in charge of three companies of worn, tired men. Walker was a tactical genious, one of the few men good enough to get into the exclusive Officer's Academy, and one of a fewer number to graduate with flying colors. However, the man was a very sensitive, down-to-earth officer, completely empathetic to his men. He refused to send them on risky missions not only for their danger, but of fear that the men he had worked so hard to protect would be killed by his orders.

To prevent this occurence, he stayed up through the night, shrugging off fatigue with startling tenacity, testing every strategy he could concoct, finding the one that would best fit the current situation. However, tonight was different. By an odd stroke of luck, his brain had sparked an idea worthy of Walker's reputation earlier than usual.

A single squad of volunteers would venture out deep into enemy territory, covered by a dozen snipers to prevent casualties, and would lure out as many enemies as they could. Once they had captured the Bloodmages' attention, they would fall back to Floral Boulevard, and would lead the Order into an ambush. Waiting for them would be an armoured column of Hulk Battletanks, and a squadron of Sentinel Mechs. Once the attackers were killed, the Sentinels would take to the skies, and bombard the Slums, their current target. After ten minutes of bombing, the Sentinels would retreat back to base, and the tanks will roll into the Poor District, backed up by a single company of UMC Marines, and a platoon of 25 Terminators, led by Captain Ni'han, whose team was rescued in the chaos of the previous day's conflict.

It was pure genious. Even a modest man such as Walker could not deny it, this plan was remarkable, especially to have been concocted in a half-hour. While Walker finished calculating a few minute details, a man walked in. Sergeant "Paulie" Jackson, a remarkable recruit, whose squad had become famous among his company for their bravado against the Shifter incursions.

"Sergeant Jackson, what brings you here at this time?" Walker asked.

"Insomnia. Couldn't get any sleep, so I came to see what deathtrap you're planning for us tomorrow." The two shared a laugh, as Walker was known for being one of the few commanders with a sense of humor. Paulie observed the maps, diagrams and records for several minutes, until he turned back to Walker. The smile was gone from his face, and it was obvious that Sgt. Jackson now only meant business.

"Warrent Officer Walker," Paulie began. "I would like to volunteer my company to lead the incursion into the Slums, and I would like my squad to be at the head, sir. I have personal business, and I believe it may be there."

"Well, Sergeant Jackson. Personally, I have no problem with this. However, the matter of your rank remains. I don't see how a Sergeant has the say to lead an entire company."

"I see." Paulie said, slightly quieter now. "Understood, sir."

"So," Walker continued. "I would like to wish you luck in the incursion tomorrow, First Sergeant Jackson. Godspeed."

[STARWARSFREAK]

I noticed at least ten more views have come up since my last chapter, but no one's posted. Double posting of any kind doesn't really sit well with me, so any comments would be greatly appreciated. Besides, I'll never improve without criticism!

Chapter 17:

Heinrich was full to bursting with glee as he marched his way down the alley. Just that morning, he had been promoted to Warder for killing a group of Shifters on his own! Oh, the glee he felt was incredible! It made him happy as nothing ever had, he felt invincible, as if he could do anything! The excitement of the young mage only grew as his colleague, Spartus called him over. The two peered out of the alley to see 15 or so Bloodbolts cautiously moving up the street. Oh, the joy in Heinrich's heart! If he could just finish these men off, he would be promoted yet again; there was simply no doubt of it. He quickly calmed his mind and sent a message to every Bloodmage in the block through their telepathic connections.

On Market Street, I spy a single squad of the Bloodbolts. Everyone, come quickly and help me kill them. Just remember, I spotted them first!

Heinrich and Spartus tailed the Bloodbolts cautiously, and were soon joined by almost thirty more. Then fifty. Then a hundred! Oh, the Bloodbolts didn't stand a chance! Heinrich almost felt pity for them.

Almost.

With a bloodcurdling yell, Heinrich led the charge as the band of Bloodmages rushed out of every alleyway from every side. However, the Bloodbolts reacted quickly, and surprisingly calmly after seeing themselves so outnumbered by the mages. They ran back the way they came, and were hotly pursued. As they ran down the street, even more mages joined the hunt. They fired off bolts of lightning, fireballs, anything to slow them, but it seemed as if they were invincible, as they dodged or shrugged off every hit.

The chase culminated, as they squad rounded a final corner. They were doomed, they simply couldn't escape. Heinrich led the Bloodmages around the corner for a quick, painless victory. However, they found anything but.

Before them stood hundreds of Bloodbolts, exactly how many Heinrich did not know, only that the mages were now the ones hopelessly outnumbered, not their technophile opponents. But it got worse. Among their ranks were massive, gleaming white mechs standing almost thirty feet into the air, wielding gigantic variations of the Bloodbolts' assault rifles. Behind those rested at least two dozen tanks, their gray-green plating shimmering in the bright sunlight, but obscured by the smog that clogged the air.

Before Heinrich could even think to utter the words "retreat", a thousand shells, bullets, and other projectiles took flight, and the entire Bloodmage column was no more. Heinrich lay on the ground, his entire lower body a bloody, pulpy heap, the rest was crated and marked with bullet holes and worse. He knew he was dead, yet he couldn't die. He watched the hundreds of troops march by, until one passed right by him. A tall African man, with muscles of remarkable size. On his battle armor's shoulder, golden striped signified his rank of First Sergeant - a Warder, by the Order's terms for rank. The man looked down at Heinrich, noticing he was still alive. Casually, as if it were a daily occurence, he flipped off his rifle's safety, and pointed his barrel at the frontal lobe of the mage. Without hesitation, he pulled the trigger.

Heinrich drifted away into the mist, his soul to lay at rest among the millions of others dead by this war...


Not my best work, but the assault into the Slums is a long chapter, and I needed to split it up a little to prevent writing the Great Text Wall of China.